I should probably start with a bit of an update on what has been happening. Some of you may have caught up on the news and some may not. This is not some preferential treatment of friendship levels or the like. Simply, sometimes this is how things unfold and when I get a chance to type.

This was going to be a short post, but get me in a hospital room with no where to go but inside the hospital grounds, and you have a bored typist waiting to type, so I have made the quick version and a long ramble version 🤣.

Quick Version:

• Hematoma in neck on Thursday.
• Drain stopped working Thursday arvo.
• Back in for surgery on Thursday night.
• Two drains now working away correctly.
• Probably out of Hospital on Monday/Tuesday.

Long Ramble Version:

So after my surgery on Wednesday and my last post, I was doing well. I came out of surgery and everything was working as it should.

However after the post I had a bit of a lump in my neck and my drain was not, well draining . Who would think that a drain is meant to, you know, drain. Well people, it is, supposedly that is the important job it does. Dr Strange came to see me in the morning and worked some magic with the nurses and we waited to see if this fixed things. 

Dr Strange’s junior surgeon came back up a bit later to take a look and with a sigh, agreed that things were not quite right. He then got Dr Strange to come back up and have another look. Somehow, Dr Strange managed to use his time manipulation skills to his advantage and was in two places at once (he was doing a nine hour micro surgery and seeing me at the same time!!).

Anyway long story short (hmm or long story long), I had a hematoma (a collection of blood/blood clots/internal bleeding) in my neck that shouldn’t be there and the drain had stopped. Dr Strange let me know he would round up a team (well his junior surgeon would) and I was heading back into surgery that night. He then time warped to finish his other surgery – I am still confused how he does that.

Surgery Take Two

So a bit later (about 7:30pm), I changed into a nice hospital gown – bum NOT showing. The junior surgeon and I worked out that dinner was long enough ago (as was explained to me, no one works out if you were coming home from dinner when you have a car accident and need emergency surgery 😉 – hmm good thought/logic – let us do this surgery). 

I was then wheeled down to waiting room, the fourth one from yesterday (yes people, I missed the first three waiting rooms from the day before, so I guess they are not needed or required. Let us talk efficiency – ohh hang on, there was also only one other person in that waiting room and they normally have two identical rooms going during weekdays that are full with ten people each, continuously flowing in/out. Hmmm maybe they know what they are doing – perhaps leave it how it is for now. 

Anyway I was then checked to make sure my memory was still working –  yep still know who I am and what date I was born. 

Why, Why, Why?

A bit of a wait in this waiting room, so wondered what I could find amusing to kill the time. I quickly scanned the room and hey presto – got it. The room is large with ten “stations” for beds to be rolled in/out (this is the pre-surgery/recovery room), each with medical supplies etc ready to go, and in each of these “stations” four holders for gloves. Now the gloves were not consistent, the smart ones had S,M,L,XL from lowest to highest, but surely someone was taking the …. umm the mickey, for some of the stations. Some were in reverse order. Let us think about this, short people normally have smaller hands, and the height of the top gloves, well, let’s say I would love to see a person who is height deprived reaching for the small gloves when placed at the top position – think a hobbit or a dwarf jumping to the top shelf – even I would have to stretch and I have long monkey boy arms.

The Drug Room

Anyway, I was wheeled into the “drug” room (the place they can juice you up ready for theatre when they are really busy). As they were not busy I just laid there and watched the working clock tick by (unlike the other drug room that had a clock that did not work). No sleepiness this time either as no pre-med medication given.

While waiting I was visited by the theatre nurse, the anaesthetist nurse, Dr Strange and the anaesthetist, that is everyone in theatre except the junior surgeon who was still probably scrubbing in after doing all the paperwork and not having the secrets to Dr Strange Time Travel techniques. For ease I will call the anaesthetist the drug-giver as it is easier than anaesthetist (I have used the spell checker way too many times for that word – wow it is a horrid word). 

Anyway I was wheeled into the operating theatre at 08:30pm, swapped beds to the narrow easily wipeable one. They got things setup around me, the drug-giver comes up to me, checks I still know who I am, looks at my arm and cannula, then walks away to his trolley. I start to feel a bit “spinny” and “not quite right” but not sure either if I am imaging the weird feeling. The drug-giver turns and says, “ohh yeah, you might feel a bit strange, I just gave you the first meds”. I had to laugh out loud at that point, and while laughing say “ohh that answers that then – I thought something wasn’t right but didn’t know if it was just me!!” ohh we laughed and then he filled my veins with some other stuff and I have no idea what happened next!!

I woke in the recovery room (aka waiting room 4) finally. Well if we are honest, I probably woke a few times before that but cannot remember, also do not know if I told embarrassing stories either. It was around 10:15pm by now.

Back to the Ward

I was wheeled back to my room by 10:30pm and hey presto, the “leaky” vessels are stitched up, I now have no clots and two drains in my neck with two vacuum tubs to carry around. 

Well that is the update. I now have to wait till Monday/Tuesday for these drains to come out so just chillin’ with a nice view (see picture above), TV, food service delivered every 5 hours, internet and my laptop/headphones – I also have access to a cafe (as I am allowed to go walk about in the hospital). Of course I have also had a few visitors including the Mad Scientist and the cheeky monkeys to keep me distracted/occupied.

This is a bit like being stuck in a hotel with only room service as your food option but without the minibar to numb the boredom – but I do have a selection of drugs available now I think about it (just don’t have much pain to numb, so not been asking for the drugs!!). This is probably a good problem to have :-).